Happy New Year!

I dedicate this song to all of my family and friends. Whether you realize it or not, you have helped me through some of the most difficult circumstances in my life and I could not have done it without you. I love you all.


THIS LOVE WILL CARRY

Music & Lyrics by Dougie MacLean. Published by Limetree Arts and Music

It's a thin line that leads us and keeps a man from shame
And dark clouds quickly gather along the way he came
There's fear out on the mountain and death out on the plain
There's heartbreak and heart-ache in the shadow of the flame

CHORUS
(But) this love will carry. This love will carry me
I know this love will carry me

The strongest web will tangle, the sweetest bloom will fall
And somewhere in the distance we try and catch it all
Success lasts for a moment and failure's always near
And you look down at your blistered hands as turns another year
CHORUS

These days are golden, they must not waste away
Our time is like that flower and soon it will decay
And though by storms we're weakened, uncertainty is sure
And like the coming of the dawn it's ours for evermore
CHORUS

Snowpacolypse or Snowmagedeon

Well, those are two names that have been bandied about on Twitter the last few days. This storm delivered exactly what was predicted here in Annapolis. We got just around 21 inches.

These are from yesterday afternoon -

This is from late last night. That's my gas grill and a big trash can -


And this is the view from this morning out my back door and of my car. Needless to say, I did not make it to church this morning.

My Dreadlocks

Recently I was approached by a very sweet septuagenarian after church with some questions about my hair. Apparently she has been sitting a few pews behind me for the past few years (Presbyterians are such creatures of habit that we have unofficial self imposed assigned seating) and finally decided to ask me about my dreadlocks. She has been curious, and after a disclaimer about not wanting to offend me, worked up the nerve to say "I know your hair is making a statement, but I was curious as to what that might be?" After a good chuckle I told her that I hadn't overtly intended on a single statement when I decided to undertake this style, but that there were several that came to mind for me. More on those in a bit.

While discussing this with my sister, Becky, she reminded me of an essay that was a big part in my decision to try this hairstyle. It is entitled Sister and it is from Anne Lamott's book Traveling Mercies: Some Thoughts on Faith. Anne Lamott was definitely an inspiration for me adopting this hairstyle. After being approached by strangers asking how they could get their hair to look like hers she says this --

"Mostly people see someone with dreadlocks, especially a white person with dreadlocks, and assume that the person's hair carries with it a position or message -- the message being, Maybe you don't have as many prejudices against me as you do against black people, but you should. Most people, if asked might wonder if perhaps dreadlocks are somewhat unpatriotic --isn't it unpatriotic not to comb your hair? The tangles are so funky, and who knows, they may harbor bugs and disease. Perhaps to some people dreadlocks indicate confusion of thought and character: good children have shiny combed hair, while bad children, poor children, loser kids, have bushy hair.
But two people in St. Louis stopped me on the street and asked for instructions on how to get their hair to look like mine."

In this essay she recounts the problems that she had with her hair and how much of a source of anxiety it was for her for 40 years. She was constantly worried about the weather and went through tons of products (mousse, gel, etc) to attempt to control her fluffy wiry hair. I can certainly relate. My hair, when not super short has always required a good deal of effort and/or gel to get it to do what I want it to do.

She keeps thinking "How much longer am I going to think about my hair more often than about things in the world that matter?" After some gentle prodding from a neighbor and a revelation while watching The Shawshank Redemption she allowed her friends to come over and start her locks.

"Dreadlocks would be a way of saying I was no longer going to play by the rules of mainstream white beauty. it meant that I was no longer going to even try and blend. It was a way of saying that I know what kind of hair I have, I know what it looks like, and I am going to stop trying to pretend it is different than that. That I was going to celebrate instead."

"The dreads are so cool: no wonder two people in St. Louis wanted my secret. Like snowflakes, each dreadlock is different, has its own configuration, its own breadth and feel."

So, what statement am I making with my locks?

I have always enjoyed being a little bit "out there" in order to draw attention to myself. Hair style is an easy way to accomplish this. I've been doing it since junior high with a "spike", a rat tail, long hair, crew cut, completely shaved, the James Dean pompadour, you name it. (photo album of my many styles) My dreads definitely help me in social situations when I often retract into my introverted nature. Like Anne's new friends in St. Louis, strangers will often ask me questions or want to touch them in line at the grocery store or out at restaurants. Its quite amusing and brings me out of my shell to meet and talk to people that I otherwise would not have interacted with 9 times out of 10. They are my ambassadors, my tentacles to reach out to the world.

As a white middle class heterosexual male I have rarely experienced what actual prejudice feels like, but I was raised to want to combat it any way that I can. I do know that often those barriers come down when people are directly exposed to people of different stripes. It is harder to be homophobic when you meet or are related to a gay individual. It is harder to be racist when you have friends or coworkers of another race. So, it is my hope and desire that people who know me or meet me will pause before jumping to conclusions about someone else who looks different than them.
In much the same way my hair affects my behavior and attitudes too. It gives me the incentive and opportunity to overcome the stereotypes that are out there. That only works if my behavior and actions are contrary to what those stereotypes are.

It also helps to remind me not to jump to conclusions either because I have now had a small taste of what that feels like. I have been pulled over by the police without committing any moving violation a handful of times. I'm fairly certain that I was profiled. I have also been mistaken for one of the homeless while volunteering. These are not even close to what so many endure on a daily basis and I can always change my hair, but my empathy grew as a result.

Like Anne Lamott I see my dreads as "an act of both triumph and surrender to give up trying to have (normal) hair." They help me socially and they help me to spread the message of equality for all.

I also happen to think that they look great.
I put this photo album together on Facebook to show the progression of my locks over the last four years for the company where I got my instructions and products - DreadheadHQ.com Anyone considering this style should check out their website. You don't have to buy the products in order to start your own locks, but I would highly recommend them. The products and the people behind them are excellent.
UPDATE - Last night after posting this I saw the following "Tweet" from Joan Walsh, editor of Salon - "I promised to Tweet with Anne Lamott, but our dogs are going wild. Plus, nothing good to Tweet about..."

Knowing that Anne was in the room with Joan and that they were monitoring Twitter while watching election returns I sent the following message - "@joanwalsh Tell Anne that there's another Presbyterian w/dreads in MD who loves her and quoted her on his blog today. Love you too Joan." Didn't get a reply (didn't really expect to) but at least I got to tell one of my favorite authors how great I think she is and there is an ever so slim chance that she might have checked this post out. How cool would that be?

UPDATE #2 - In April, I found out that Anne Lamott was doing a book signing in Northern Virginia in support of her new fictional novel, Imperfect Birds. On the spur of the moment I hopped in my car and drove over to see her speak for about 45 minutes, take questions and got her to sign my well worn copy of Traveling Mercies and a brand spanking new copy of the new novel for Becky's birthday present. I was too nervous to think to ask her if she ever saw my Tweet or read my blog post, but I did tell her that she was part of my inspiration for the hairstyle, that I was heading to seminary in the Fall, and how much progressive Christians appreciate her voice and writings.

Obama and the Nobel Peace Prize

When someone else explains something so much better than you ever could then why re-invent the wheel? Rachel Maddow lays out the case for why our president was deserving of the honor that was announced on Friday morning and how strange it is that people are getting so bent out of shape over it.

Rachel Maddow: The Nobel Prize & Obama Derangement Syndrome

"The American president just won the Nobel Peace Prize. By any reasonable measure, all Americans should be proud." - Rachel Maddow

UPDATE - I can't resist adding this comment from Bill Maher.

"Republicans would bitch if Obama got a BET award."

- BILL MAHER, on the right’s reaction to Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize, on Real Time

Obama Speech at College Park

President Obama is in full court press mode on Health Care Reform, so it was fitting that he spoke in a basketball arena last week. My father and I went to the University of Maryland last Thursday to see his speech at the Comcast Center. Below are a few photos that I took and the CSPAN video of the speech. The speech was good, but unfortunately the sound system was lousy. They choose not to use the house PA and instead used a temporary set up of speakers hanging above and in front of the stage. The speakers were pointed straight ahead from the stage and did not provide very good sound to the sides of the arena. Luckily the scoreboard in the center had the closed captioning turned on and we were able to read the speech. The brief delay to get the text onto the screen made the applause lines a bit choppy though.

He was even heckled at one point, but the heckler was shouted down by those around him and quickly escorted out by police.

I'm not sure, but I think the heckler might have been related to Gallagher.

He ended with the full story of the "Fired up! Ready to go!" rally cry as he has been doing a lot lately.
Here is the CSPAN video of the speech -

Kanye strikes again!

Now he has taken over my blog..... click here

Thank You Kanye West

The ridiculous behavior of Kanye West has allowed President Obama to indirectly tell us what he thought of Rep. Joe Wilson's outburst last week.

Barack Obama, as the President, handled the outburst during his speech exactly as he should have. After his initial pause he continued his speech. The next day he was gracious and quickly accepted Rep. Wilson's apology. Nothing for him to gain by dignifying the bad behavior of a "back bench" congressman with escalation. No need to stoop to his level and allow the story to get any bigger than it naturally was/is.

But in a leaked "off the record" conversation that was probably similar to so many "water cooler conversations" Americans everywhere have been having about a pop culture event, we get to see what Barack Obama, the regular American, thinks about someone who speaks out of turn and (attempts to) upstage someone who deserved the floor.

Audio of the President talking about Kanye West.

The question to him is even framed as Kanye West giving Taylor Swift "the Joe Wilson treatment."

So, by simple induction --- If Barack Obama says that Kanye is a "jackass" for Joe Wilson-like behavior, then we can assume that Barack Obama must think that Joe Wilson is a "jackass."

You can see here that House Rules were broken by Rep. Joe Wilson.

Under clause 1(a)(1) of Rule XI, the rules of the House are the rules of its committees as far as applicable. Consequently, Members should comport themselves with the rules of decorum and debate in the House and in Committees specifically with regard to references to the President of the United States as stated in Sec. 370 of the House Rules and Manual.

As stated in Cannon’s Precedents, on January 27, 1909, the House adopted a report in response to improper references in debate to the President. That report read in part as follows:

"It is... the duty of the House to require its Members in speech or debate to preserve that proper restraint which will permit the House to conduct its business in an orderly manner and without unnecessarily and unduly exciting animosity among its Members or antagonism from those other branches of the Government with which the House is correlated."

Tonight the House voted to officially "disapprove" of his behavior. In other words, he was formally and politely called a jackass.

Here is a bizarre thought - perhaps Kanye is another one of those Sacha Baron Cohen characters. He is, after all the same "jackass" that gave us this treasure -
"George Bush does not care about black people."

Dr. Marvin, guess what? Ahoy, I sail, I'm a sailor, I sail!

What About Bob clip
I hadn't been on a sailboat in twenty years until this Saturday. What a great day, which was even better since it was to support the youth program at First Presbyterian of Annapolis. Every Fall, we have an auction to raise money to support the youth program. Last year one of the items that was donated was an afternoon of sailing out on the Chesapeake Bay. Our congregation really gets into the auction and is incredibly generous with their bids and donations. When the sailing item came up my friend Craig and I decided to pool our resources and go in together for it and we were successful.

The plan was to go out in the Spring, but it took until this weekend to find a suitable time that Craig, Jen, Vern, me and the boat were all available and in good health simultaneously. It was well worth the wait. Despite a so-so forecast and a gray morning we had a gorgeous sunny day and a nice breeze for most of the five hours we were out on the water. Vern let each of us take turns at the helm and I was fortunate enough to have my turn through the best winds of the day.

Our top speed was around 5.5 knots. For those of you familiar with the Bay, Vern lives in Amberly so we came out of Whitehall Creek into the Chesapeake just south of the Bay Bridge. We sailed down along the west side past Annapolis, Bay Ridge and Arundel on the Bay. We tacked east before we got all the way to Thomas Point and shot over towards Kent Island. We came about again and managed to take a single line from the east side of the Bay all the way into the mouth of the Severn. We turned around just off of the Naval Academy sea wall and headed back up the west side of the Bay to Whitehall Creek.

A fabulous day with great company spent out on the water. It doesn't get much better than that.

FYI - The boat Vern has is a Sabre 28. I also found this review which has some interest info about this boat that is no longer made and is almost as old as I am.

Amen Mr. President

We cannot know for certain how long we have here. We cannot foresee the trials or misfortunes that will test us along the way. We cannot know God's plan for us.

What we can do is to live out our lives as best we can with purpose, and love, and joy. We can use each day to show those who are closest to us how much we care about them, and treat others with the kindness and respect that we wish for ourselves. We can learn from our mistakes and grow from our failures. And we can strive at all costs to make a better world, so that someday, if we are blessed with the chance to look back on our time here, we can know that we spent it well; that we made a difference; that our fleeting presence had a lasting impact on the lives of other human beings.

President Barack Obama's words from the eulogy for Sen. Kennedy.

Beware the OLIGARHY!

Is there a "C", Pat??

Glenn Beck is a comic genius. I am becoming more and more convinced that he and Orly Taitz are characters created by Sacha Baron Cohen. Only instead of playing them himself as he did with Borat, Bruno and Ali G, Cohen has enlisted the help of some truly gifted improv performers since he is now so recognizable.


YouTube - Glenn Beck Can't Spell (Shared via AddThis)

Hilarious/horrifying post detailing more of Beck's rantings. Did you know that President Obama is creating a Secret Army? They are organizing via Twitter.

His ramped up hysteria is mostly in response to a campaign to have sponsors boycott his program because he called the President a "racist" with a "deep seeded hatred of white people."
The campaign has been pretty successful (at last count 39 companies had pulled their ads) and folks are speculating that the end may be near for him on FoxNews. A recent monologue he gave seems to indicate he may think that's the case too.

I am making light of this, but in reality I think that this is pretty reprehensible. He acts as if this is about First Amendment Rights, but whipping people into a frenzy the way he is attempting to do with his show is akin to yelling "Fire" in a crowded theater. Sooner or later someone is going to get trampled and that isn't going to be the least bit funny.

47 Years in the Senate and 15,235 votes cast

The video tribute above was produced by ThinkProgress’ Victor Zapanta.


In addition to this "Day in 100 Seconds" piece, Talking Points Memo has a collection of videos with the statements by President Obama, Vice President Biden, former President Carter, Senator John McCain and many others. Perhaps the most poignant of all of them is actually from last year. It is a video of Senator Byrd reading a statement into the Senate record after hearing the news of Kennedy's brain cancer diagnosis.

Senator Kennedy's family set up this web site in his honor and you can peruse his many accomplishments, read and/or watch his speeches, look at pictures, share memories and send sympathies to his family.

"Every American should have the opportunity to receive a quality education, a job that respects their dignity and protects their safety, and health care that does not condemn those whose health is impaired to a lifetime of poverty and lost opportunity." - Edward M. Kennedy

They were for "death panels" before they were against them

Does anyone remember the Terri Schiavo Debacle? It was the Florida case between a husband and his in-laws that made it into the Capitol Building and onto every TV channel. They were fighting about what to do with the poor woman in a vegetative state who could no longer speak for herself. Unfortunately she had not put in writing any definitive answers regarding what her wishes were in the event that she ended up like she did.

Someone obviously does remember because they wanted to make sure that Health Care Reform addressed the issue. This would be the now infamous section on page 424 of HR 3200 that according to some creates "death panels" or encourages suicide. It expands Medicare coverage to pay for folks to voluntarily have a conversation with their doctor about "advance directives."

Despite the fact that the creation of "death panels" has been thoroughly debunked, opponents of Health Care Reform continue to push this nonsense into the debate. Sarah Palin and Newt Gingrich are front and center on this issue (having been backed up by Rush Limbaugh, Michael Steele, and Senator Grassley).

How inconvenient for both Palin and Gingrich to have Think Progress uncover them supporting these same consultations in the very recent past.

When then-Governor Palin endorsed "Healthcare Decisions Day" on April 16, 2008 she "urged public facilities to provide better information about advance directives, and made it clear that it is critical for seniors to be informed of such options."

In April of this year Mr. Gingrich praised a hospital in Wisconson for their use of "advance directives" as being extremely cost effective and more efficient. He even goes on to say that their "approach empowers patients and families to control and direct their care."

So why are they both now opposed to a section in proposed legislation that would encourage the very thing that they are both obviously in favor of?

Why is something that made so much sense to them now so scary and nefarious?

Someone should ask them.




Talking Points Memo now has a handy run down on the entire "death panel" meme.

Reform, In A Nutshell

Paul Krugman, Nobel Prize winning Economist -

"The essence is really quite simple: regulation of insurers, so that they can't cherry-pick only the healthy, and subsidies, so that all Americans can afford insurance," Krugman said. He added, "[W]hat it means for the individual will be that insurers can't reject you, and if your income is relatively low, the government will help pay your premiums."

Our President -

"For all the chatter and the yelling and the shouting and the noise, what you need to know is this: If you don't have health insurance, you will finally have quality, affordable options, once we pass reform. If you do have health insurance, we will make sure that no insurance company, or a government bureaucrat, gets between you and the care that you need. And we will do this without adding to our deficit over the next decade"

And from Steve Benen at the Washington Monthly (title to this post borrowed from his)-

"Three sentences.

If you don't have coverage, you'll get coverage.
If you have coverage, insurers won't be able to screw you over.
And we can achieve this without increasing the deficit.

Everything else relates to mechanical details to get us from here to there."

Lather, rinse, repeat......

Health Care Reform

I've been following the side show that is happening in the place of an actual debate about Health Care Reform and am at a loss. Those opposing reform have tapped into the fear, distrust and anger of many among us and are using it to derail any chance of a real discussion about the pending legislation. There are plenty of actual issues that we could be discussing such as the public option, single payer, or mandates but instead we are talking about "death panels", "socialism", "being un-American", and "turning in your neighbor."

Its a damned if you do, damned if you don't kind of situation. Not addressing these issues is seen as a concession to their validity and addressing them takes the debate down a tangent and away from the actual topic at hand. I think that is precisely what those who oppose reform want and it has quickly spread out of the individual town hall meetings and into the media, blogosphere, and social networking sites. I'm not suggesting that there aren't actual citizens who are showing up at the meetings, writing emails and taking a stand against reform. There are. Unfortunately many of them are misinformed, they are getting angrier, the confrontations are getting violent and there have been at least three (1 2 3) instances of guns being brought to rallies.

I think we desperately need to find a way to engage each other in a meaningful way so that we can deal with this issue that almost everyone agrees must be addressed. David Frum, who was a speech writer for President Bush, is someone who I usually do not agree with on just about anything. However, like Andrew Sullivan I find myself agreeing with Frum. Last week he wrote a piece ruminating on the "cost" of winning . i.e. -- "beat back the president’s proposals, defeat the House bill, stand back and wait for 1994 to repeat itself."

The problem is that if we do that… we’ll still have the present healthcare system. Meaning that we’ll have (1) flat-lining wages, (2) exploding Medicaid and Medicare costs and thus immense pressure for future tax increases, (3) small businesses and self-employed individuals priced out of the insurance market, and (4) a lot of uninsured or underinsured people imposing costs on hospitals and local governments.

We’ll have entrenched and perpetuated some of the most irrational features of a hugely costly and under-performing system, at the expense of entrepreneurs and risk-takers, exactly the people the Republican party exists to champion.

Not a good outcome.

There is a really good diary over at Talking Points Memo called "I Don't Trust Your Side, and My Side Sickens Me" that captures the difficulties of this situation quite well. The author is a liberal woman who has in her family and circle of friends many people on the other side of the debate. Her post details her frustration with the situation and her attempts to have a civil dialogue with her friends and family. I am most impressed by her desire which is not just to debate her side of the issue, but to view the opposition with compassion and attempt to understand where they are coming from in the hopes of a meaningful dialogue. She writes -

And I think the final answer is this:

I reached out to conservative family and friends with affection and respect.

They responded in kind.

In the final analysis, I don't think we're going to see much meeting of minds in rage-infested town halls or plaquard-bearing public venues of any kind.

Maybe not in private e-mail exchanges, either.

But if we are going to find some sort of way to tackle the gigantic problems that this country faces, then we are going to have to do it one on one, as I did, with the people who know us, love us, and trust us--at least, on matters unrelated to politics.

Maybe, in that way, we can begin to put some sort of salve on the open burning wounds of hate-rhetoric that flies around both sides of the aisle.

And if all we do, in the long run, is agree to disagree, then if it is done with love and respect, then maybe that is one less Democrat for them to hate or one less Republican for us to hate.

And if that's not civil discourse, I don't know what is.

I pray that we get the insurance reform that we need so badly, but even more so that we can learn to treat each other with love and respect even when we passionately disagree.

Now I'll Never Be President....

A Long July

My apologies for how "quiet" my blog has been recently. July was a long difficult month. It feels like a lifetime ago that I returned from the youth mission trip. July started out with a busy week sandwiched between the mission trip and my family vacation. A week spent doing testing for the workers compensation process, several work items, saying goodbye to my good friend Dan who will be studying in Ireland for at least the next year, and preparing for being away from home for another week. The kennels that I prefer were all booked on the 4th of July, so I couldn't leave until Sunday morning. I missed the first night at the lake with the family, but met up with everyone at my cousin Brad's high school graduation party outside of Pittsburgh. It was great to see my aunts, uncles and cousins. We had a really nice day, ate tons of delicious food and I spent a good bit of time drooling over cousin Steven's new Harley.

Our week at the lake was really nice except for the fact that most of us were fighting a summer cold for at least part of the week. I actually spent one whole day in bed with chills, a sore throat and a horrible headache. We still had a really nice time and it was very relaxing, but there ought to be some sort of law against being sick on vacation. It was also my first vacation in fifteen years without Danielle, so that added a strange dimension to the week for me. Luckily swimming, boating, tubing, fishing and being with my family were way too much fun to allow either the cold or the lack of my spouse to overshadow them.

I returned from vacation to a very busy week at the church. On Sunday the 12th our youth group, along with the Anglican youth group down the street and two young ladies from the Czech Republic (visiting our church for 6 weeks), went to Quiet Waters Park and rented kayaks, canoes, and peddle boats for an afternoon on the water. Monday through Friday that week our church was a buzz with over 65 kids for Vacation Bible School. Many of the teens from our youth group and St. Anne's group help shepherd the little ones around and I lead worship in the style of Taizé on Thursday. Its always a lot of fun and quite exhausting. Five groups rotate through in 30 minute intervals with barely a chance to catch your breath. At the end of the week Miss, my good friend and the Director of Childrens Ministry, and I took the 20 teen helpers out for pizza. On Saturday the 18th we had a great turn out of current youth and some college students home for the summer at Sweat Equity to work on our church campus.

The workers compensation process has taken a few bizarre turns this past month. After the function evaluation was completed, I met with my vocational counselor again and we reviewed a rough draft of the plan he has drawn up. As he had told me previously, my plans for seminary are too far down the road to incorporate into their vocational plan, so they are recommending I go back into mortgages or some other similar office based occupation for the time being. He said that since I have a college degree and a prior career that was not physical there wasn't much that they would do for me other than provide leads and monitor my job search. I was advised that perhaps it would make more sense for me to investigate the possibility of a permanency award since I am now considered to be permanently partially disabled, and handle the job search on my own. Unfortunately I have run into several dead ends attempting to get answers regarding a permanent award. While trying to get answers and navigate this maze of bureaucracy a new adjuster took over my file. She "discovered" that I have been working my youth job part time while receiving disability checks for my facility job and feels that I have been overpaid for the last year and a half. She stopped authorizing my disability checks and has been in the process of recalculating my benefits for the last two weeks. I put discovered in quotes because this has been very much out in the open from the very beginning. I am awaiting something formal in writing so that I can appeal to the state Workers' Compensation Commission and have contacted an attorney since this has suddenly gotten very complicated.

Where the beginning of this month was chocked full of activity, the end of the month was way too empty leaving what felt like far too much time to dwell on the problems with my disability claim, the passing of my first wedding anniversary since my wife left me, and the first time in over 16 months without doctor appointments or physical therapy. I have very much been "in the thick of it" for the last 16 months. This lull was no fun, but I realize that it was a very necessary step in my healing process. I needed the down time to reflect, digest and experience a lot of the emotions that got pushed aside while I was in crisis mode.

The end of July also included my 39th birthday. I celebrated with my family at my parents' house on the 23rd and then enjoyed a concert on the 24th featuring two of my favorite artists. I finally got to see Willie Nelson live, although he was chased off of the stage by a lightening storm after only 4 or 5 songs. The best performance of the night was by the artist who interested me the least going in. John Mellencamp put on quite a show and had everyone dancing and singing along. The headliner for the tour was the one and only Bob Dylan who unfortunately was not in the mood to enunciate (even more than usual). Luckily I've seen him previously and I know he can put on a great live show, because this was not an inspired performance, although the song selection was great and the band was fabulous.

Last month had its highlights and the good definitely outweighed the bad, but I must say I am glad that July is behind us. I'm looking forward to making progress on the Workers' Compensation issues this month, gearing up for the beginning of the program year with the youth group, getting back to work on a full time basis and making some headway on my investigation of seminaries.

America's Most Trusted Newscaster? Jon Stewart

Hat tip to Andrew Sullivan and GOOD for this poll (which GOOD notes is probably not that scientific or reliable).

Happy Independence Day!

I AM A PATRIOT - performed by Jackson Browne, written by "Little Steven" Van Zandt (of the East Street Band, The Sopranos, and Little Steven's Underground Garage Radio Program)

And the river opens for the righteous [5x]
Someday

I was walking with my brother
And he wondered what's on my mind
I said what I believe in my soul
Ain't what I see with my eyes
And we can't turn our backs this time

I am a patriot
And I love my county
Because my country is all I know
I want to be with my family
The people who understand me
I've got nowhere else to go

And the river opens for the righteous
And the river opens for the righteous
And the river opens for the righteous
Someday

And I was talking with my sister
She looked so fine
I said, "Baby, what's on your mind?"
She said, "I want to run like the lion
Released from the cages
Released from the rages
Burning in my heart tonight"

And I ain't no communist
And I ain't no capitalist
And I ain't no socialist
And I ain't no imperialist
And I ain't no democrat
And I ain't no republican
I only know one party
And it is freedom

I am, I am, I am
I am a patriot
And I love my country
Because my county is all I know

And the river opens for the righteous
And the river opens for the righteous
And the river opens for the righteous
Someday

Youth Mission Trip

My sister Becky and I led a group of six teenagers from our church on a mission trip last week. We stayed at the Calvin Center, a camp/conference center that is part of the Presbyterian Church (USA) just south of Atlanta.

We all met at the church on Monday morning, were seen off by the associate pastor Rev. Heather Shortlidge (who had just returned from Iona), and piled into Samantha Mierau and Lisa Allison's cars for the trip to the airport. I have to say the group and I were slightly disappointed when the hardware in my leg didn't set off the metal detector, but it sure made the security checkpoint simpler than I thought it was going to be. Once in Georgia it took a bit of time to get our rental van and drive to the Calvin Center, so when we got there we started our Global Village experience right away. Our leader for the Global Village, Godsway (his actual name), was from Ghana. Our dinner was specifically designed to teach us that the world is full of haves and have-nots. Godsway randomly passed out our plates which had portions of varying sizes of noodles and veggies. A few plates had a small piece of chicken as well, but not all of them. We put our bags in the lodge where we would be staying when we returned and grabbed just a few items to take with us. Pretty much we just took sunscreen, sleeping bags and pillows. We were driven to the Global Village which was in the woods a good ways away from the lodges and modern facilities. We stayed in the Haiti section. There was also a ghetto, a refugee camp, and a Palestinian area. We were "hired" for some chores - fetching clean water (about a half hour walk round trip), cleaning the kitchen and dishes, gathering fire wood, weeding the field and watering the crops. Once they were completed we were given money to spend at the market (another staff member, Robin, showed up with items to sell to us for our breakfast and lunch). We had 4 or 5 kerosene lanterns and a camp fire once the sun went down for light. The buildings were exact replicas of actual houses, separate kitchen area, outdoor shower and out houses that the staff saw in Haiti. Godsway said that they were similar to the conditions in which he grew up in Africa too. We each got a mosquito net (some of which had holes or rips) and set them up on our bunks. All six girls slept in one room, Matt and I slept in the other. Each room was half of our "house" and was just big enough to fit three bunk beds, a small table and two chairs. Robin and Godsway lead us in a short worship service around the campfire and then left us on our own for a hot and a not-so-restful night's sleep.
We woke at 7am, ate some of the fruit that we had purchased for breakfast and a few of us made some cowboy coffee and ended up with a lot of grounds in our teeth. Godsway arrived and "hired" us to work in the village field. We created rows in the soil with hoes and rakes, pulled weeds and planted a couple rows of corn. Heat index that day was 103 and Sara got a little bit overheated which caused all of us a bit of concern. We had the nurse come check on her. She was OK after a while in the shade and a good bit of water. Our lunch took quite a while to prepare. We cooked rice and beans over charcoal and it took forever to get the water to boil. Darian sauteed a bunch of veggies and Godsway cut up a mango, papaya, sugar cane and coconut for us to have as well. We spent the afternoon making bricks with a really cool machine which you can see here. It is not motorized. It works entirely with levers and brute force. (Godsway took lots of pictures and I will be getting a disc in the mail soon, so I will post pictures as soon as I have them.)

Many groups spend time in Global Village in order to simulate and prepare for oversees mission trips so that they don't experience such culture shock. We were there for just under 24 hours and I think all of us gained a new appreciation for what we have as well as a better understanding of how many people in the world live.

We spent Wednesday at Six Flags Over Georgia and had an absolute ball. I found that my leg was only an issue on a few of the rides that I wanted to ride. Everyone in our group was a major roller coaster enthusiast. Here are some pictures.

Thursday, Friday and Saturday we spent participating in the Mission Work Camp. We worked on a very nice lady's house in an old mill town. Unfortunately all the textile industry has moved overseas and the town is suffering as a result. Mrs. Hamm and her husband worked for over 35 years in the mill. She was widowed about 10 years ago and very little has been done on the house since then. We spent most of the first morning clearing debris from her yard. We filled a trailer with an old fence that had fallen over, rusted old chairs that were on the edge of her property and lots of odds and ends. We power washed and scraped peeling paint off of her foundation, front and back steps and helped her sort through a workshop/shed/storage room and carport. We also painted her living room. There was quite a list of items that the Calvin Center plans on doing to her house, but we were the first group to work on this house. There were three job sites within a few blocks of each other and a much larger group from Greensboro NC was working on the other two. One of the houses was at the end of the list of repairs after six months of groups working on it. Here are pictures of us working on Mrs. Hamm's house.

Interesting coincidence --the Greensboro group is the church in which Katie Cashwell grew up. Katie will be interning on our staff at FPC Annapolis for a year starting in August. It also turns out that this is the same church where Rich and Grier, who I met at Princeton Youth Forum (Sara Ferguson's very good friends), were youth leaders before moving to New Jersey. I love the interconnectedness and how small a community the Presbyterian Church can be.

The Calvin Center is a really great place to take a group. The staff was wonderful, the facilities were really nice and they had so many things to do. They lead devotions each morning before we went to work and we had a really nice worship service outdoors each evening. They had recreation activities for our group to choose from for the afternoons (canoeing, rock wall, ropes course, etc.). For worship, a concert and bonfire on Thursday, a pool party on Saturday, and a movie one night we joined with all of the other campers and staff.

Our group worked so hard and I am extremely proud of them. They really bonded and enjoyed spending time together too, which was great to witness and be a part of. This was not the trip that we had originally planned, but I don't think I would change anything about how it turned out. Here are some pictures of our gang just having fun

Our trip home was not as smooth as our trip down, but we all arrived safely back to our families yesterday afternoon. After boarding the plane yesterday we sat at the gate for about two hours while they fixed a broken fuel gauge on one of the wings. So we took off about the time that we were supposed to be landing in Baltimore.

My parents have been on a cruise, brother-in-law Jesko was on a business trip, Becky and I were in Georgia and my nieces were with Jesko's parents, so it was great to get home and have dinner with the whole family last night.

Highlights of my week

Wow, I've had a pretty busy week. Highlights included -

• Took care of the dogs on my own for the first full week in over a year.
• Youth group Sweat Equity last Saturday morning. So nice to wear dirty clothes, smell saw dust, and be around all the work happening on campus again.
  
• A couple of meetings at church.
• Reconnected through Facebook with my USNA roommate Dan. Talked on the phone for a while. Turns out he now lives in Towson and we are going to get together when I get home from the youth trip.
• Had sushi lunch with Brandon
• Got a package in the mail with lots of goodies from Sara F.
  
• PT twice
• Hung out with Dan, August, Sara W., and Tammy.
• Saw UP in 3-D
• Talked to Megan and Becca in Texas with Skype. Very cool!
  
• Saw Doug play at Pusser's (He's there every Friday night out on the deck 5-9pm all Summer)
• Tied up loose ends for the youth mission trip with a lot of help from Becky.
• Ran into my college girlfriend, Krissy. Met her husband and three sons.
• Helped Danielle with her homework (long story)
• No Internet connection at home for the last 2 days - major Facebook and blog withdrawal symptoms. Trying to get my fill today before I'm away from the PC for 6 days while chaperoning the youth trip with my sister.
• Attended a full immersion baptism today. First one I've ever seen and the first for our church as far as we are aware. Great day for it. The sun broke through the clouds and there were osprey overhead during the service which was in Bay Ridge. Gundel Bowen and I couldn't help but sing "Down to the river" (song most know from the Allison Krauss version in Oh Brother Where Art Thou?)
• Missed seeing my dad on Father's Day, but am glad he, mom, John and Pat are having a great time.
• Laundry, packing and pre-trip jitters.
  

Tomorrow Becky and I are taking 6 teens from the youth group to the Calvin Center south of Atlanta. I will get to go through airport security for the first time since getting my new hardware and am anxious to see how that goes.

While we are there we will be participating in the Global Villages

A place to be confronted with the never ending conditions that millions live in around the world. It brings people together to live and experience for a pre-determined period of time to understand what and how day to day life occurs in many developing countries.

and their Mission Work Camp.

Through an established connection with Meals on Wheels, elderly home owners are identified that need help with home renovations. Typical projects consist of painting, simple carpentry, yard work, and cleaning.

We're also going to spend a day at Six Flags. I'm sure we'll have lots to share when we return and hopefully will have some good pictures to post as well. I'd better get to bed since I've got to get up early to drop the dogs at the kennel. I hope everyone has a great week! Keep our group in your thoughts and prayers.

A New Phase on the Workman's Comp Front

Thursday I had two rather important appointments and have now officially entered a new phase in the Workman's Compensation process.

First I met with the Vocational Counselor that was assigned to me by the insurance company adjuster. We went over the results of the Career Assessment Inventory test that I took and he showed me the plan that he has drawn up for what they will do to get me off of disability and back to work once the doctor OKs it. No real surprises on either. They do not plan on any training for me and propose that I find a job that isn't physically demanding which shouldn't be too much of a stretch considering my degree and resume. Seminary is too far down the road for that to fit into my vocational plan (as far as the insurance company is concerned), so I will need to find something to do that won't be a long term career move, but will pay the bills while I apply to schools and figure out where I'm going, when I'm going and how I'm going to pay for school. The plan won't be finalized until the doctor says its time for me to be finished with treatment and they also need to list any restrictions in the plan.

When I finished with that meeting I was off to Baltimore to see Dr. Brumback. As always I got an x-ray as soon as I arrived and happily he didn't say anything like this cartoon to the left. He was pleased that things appear unchanged and I have had no symptoms indicating that the infection has returned. We talked about the worker's compensation process and he declared me to be MMI (Maximum Medical Improvement) which officially ends the treatment phase of my case. I'm still doing physical therapy on my own twice a week at the gym and he said there could still be slight improvements and changes for the next several months, but for all intents and purposes this is as good as I'm going to get as far as the medical professionals are concerned. My knee bends somewhere in the 50-60 degree range and I can walk/ stand without my cane for short distances/times. It's been 16 months since my accident, but every once in a while it hits me that I am permanently partially disabled. This was one of those days. Intellectually I've known this for some time now, but there has been and continues to be a small bit of hope inside me that still believes that I will bend my knee again. Hearing the doctor say MMI didn't completely erase that hope, but it sure shrunk it quite a bit.
The MMI declaration filled one of the holes in the vocational plan, but they still need to list my physical restrictions. The doctor will not/can not state these so at the request of my nurse case manager he has ordered a FCE (Functional Capabilities Evaluation) for me. I will go to a facility that will put me through a course of tests so that they can come up with a list of parameters for me. It will be an independent report that says things like - "should not lift more than X lbs. should not be required to stand for more than X minutes/hours. should primarily be in a desk job that does not require a lot of walking." or something along those lines. I imagine that this will not be a very enjoyable day of testing. I may be wrong, but envision them testing the boundaries of my capabilities in order to determine what I can and can't do. So being pushed to the point of failure repeatedly should be a nice swift kick to the old ego.

So now I'm waiting for the FCE to be scheduled. Once that is done then the Vocational Rehabilitation Plan will be completed. Then the insurance company, the counselor, and I all have to agree and sign it to put the plan into effect. The plan basically says that they will keep paying me disability checks while I look for a new job that fits my new physical limitations. They have made a few suggestions based on my college degree, mortgage background, and management experience and will provide me with leads, but I'm pretty much on my own to find a job, so if you know of any openings in the Annapolis area by all means let me know. Thanks!

Outnumbered

My friend Jenn posted these two clips from the British sitcom Outnumbered on Facebook and I am hooked. I especially like this one of the poor vicar sitting with the children at a wedding getting grilled with some particularly difficult theological questions. "Why didn't the baby Jesus just zap King Herod?" "Why didn't Jesus shape-shift into a Roman?" "What would Jesus do if he was attacked by a polar bear?"

This little girl apparently steals the show on a regular basis and after you see her funeral for a mouse that was caught in a trap set by her parents you can see why.

FOX is apparently working on an American version of this show, so we'll see how it turns out. In the mean time there are quite a few more clips like these on YouTube

Relay for Life

Tonight is going to be my family's fifth Relay for Life, which is the American Cancer Society's signature fund raising event. They are a lot of fun, inspirational and for a great cause. This will be a first for us though because our luck finally ran out with the weather and we are being forced indoors for the first time. Typically the event is held in the stadium of a local high school. Teams set up campsites on the field and folks walk around the track from 6pm on Friday until 7am on Saturday. The idea is that each team always has someone on the track walking the entire night for one big relay, since cancer never sleeps.

This year we will be moved into the school gym, so it should be interesting. No tents are allowed, so set up and preparation should be more simple than in years past, but I'm not sure anyone from our team plans to stay all night.

Our team, The J-Walkers, formed after my mom was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in January 2005. My sister is the team captain, does a fantastic job and we have raised quite a bit of money over the years.

If you'd like to make a donation in support of the American Cancer Society and all the great work that they do please visit my donation page.

Craig Ferguson's Pre-Monologue Openings

Craig Ferguson has been doing these openings every so often with lip sync versions of songs. The lead in immediately after Letterman ends, which is short and meant to hook you before they run a set of commercials or even the opening credits is perhaps my favorite 3 minutes on TV every day. Sometimes he just comes out and talks, sometimes he just makes funny faces and says nothing, often he goofs with someone in the audience, but a handful of times he's been doing these musical numbers with puppets. On a few occasions you never saw him at all, just puppets and for a few days in a row it was only a tennis ball on the end of a stick. The musical numbers are by far my favorite though. I'm including two in this post, but you can watch several of them on YouTube or the CBS Website for the show.
The yodeling song -

They Might Be Giants - Istanbul (not Constantinople)
This is what he opened with on Wednesday night (I guess technically it was Thursday morning since he starts at 12:37am.)

CPM Interview

Last night I had my interview with the Committee on Preparation for Ministry (CPM) at the Baltimore Presbytery offices. I arrived on time, but the committee was running a little behind so I had the opportunity to relax and center myself before they invited me in. I appreciated this since I had cut it closer than I had planned to and was a bit stressed when I finally got in the building and found the correct room for the meeting. As I expected it was more intimidating than meeting with the Session at my home church who know me personally, know my story, know my family and have seen me on the job for the past few years. Last night I only knew one person in the room and all but one member of the committee was a minister, so I felt that there was more pressure to present myself to them than there was at last week's interview. Both were intimidating experiences and the questions were no cake walk, but last night had a little extra something.

I was given the opportunity to make an opening statement and then questioned for about half an hour. The questions were mainly about my sense of call and what lead me to this point in my journey, but did temporarily divert to my exploration of Zen and some theological questions that stemmed from a particular statement that I made in my application. I wasn't expecting that, but apparently I handled it well enough because after being excused for twenty to twenty five minutes I was brought back in and told that the committee would take me under their care. Technically it won't be official until the Presbytery Meeting later this month when the committee presents it to the whole body for approval, but I am now an Inquirer.

Since it will be a little more than a year before I intend to start school my liaison (one of the ministers on the committee) is going to give me some books to read and we will meet periodically to discuss them, as well as my school search and my growth.

Heather, the associate pastor at my church, is a member of the committee and was the familiar face in the room. She didn't ask any questions while I was before the committee, but she did pop out of the meeting as I was leaving to tell me that I had done a fine job and to congratulate me. It was a little harder to get a read on the folks in the room since I didn't know them, so her gesture and compliment meant a lot.

Since last night was committee night at the Presbytery my friends on the Youth Committee were at the offices too. Jenn, Brandon, Vinny and Lauren waited over an hour after their meeting was over for me to be finished and took me out to celebrate at a local Ruby Tuesdays.

I am excited, nervous, humbled and ready to enter into this process.

Session Interview

I met with the Session of my church tonight about my application to become an Inquirer. After fielding a handful of questions from the Elders and Pastors I was asked to leave the room so that they could discuss my request and vote on whether or not to recommend me to the Presbytery's Committee on Preparation for Ministry (CPM).

When I was asked to rejoin the meeting I was greeted by a standing ovation and told that they had voted to support my application.

I have had this sense of call brewing inside of me for quite some time and it is a long process, so there are many steps still ahead of me, but I must say it is a wonderful feeling to have the community that I live and worship with say "yes, we think we sense that call for you too."

I have been invited to meet with the CPM next Tuesday night at the Presbytery Office in Baltimore. It will be a general interview to discuss my sense of call and the process that I intend to begin. If all goes well at that interview then I will enter into a covenant with the committee. They will work with me as I journey towards being ordained. Together we will set goals, monitor my progress spiritually, academically and otherwise to prepare me for a career in ministry.

Worker's Comp Update

With all the crazy MVA and police issues I forgot to post about a major event on my disability situation. The insurance company assigned a vocational counselor to my case. So even though Dr. Brumback hasn't officially declared me to be at Maximum Medical Improvement they have decided that I am close enough to start working towards get me back to work. He is employed by the same company that my Nurse Case Manager works for, so like her he is not directly employed by the insurance company. That way he can be objective and represent their interests and mine. We had a 90 minute interview last week, he took a resume and we discussed my future career plans. He doesn't make the ultimate decision, but helps facilitate my job search, arranges training if need be and reports to the insurance company. He gave me a 370 question "test" that I filled out this week to determine what type of career I might be suited for. It was a list of activities, jobs and academic subjects that I had to bubble in whether-

• I would really like the topic
• somewhat like the topic
• if I was indifferent/undecided
• somewhat dislike the topic or
• if I really dislike the topic.

It gets mailed off to some testing company and he'll set up another meeting when he has the results.

On a similar topic, I will be attending the session meeting at church next Tuesday night so that they can ask me questions about my Inquirer Application and vote on whether or not to support it and refer me to the Presbytery's Committee.

The end of the vehicle saga

I went to Princeton for traffic court yesterday and all is well. I got a very early start and arrived in plenty of time before it was supposed to start. It was long and boring and took several hours until I got to speak to the prosecutor. Once I talked to him and explained the circumstances, it was only about 10 - 15 more minutes before the judge called me. They reduced the charge and I plead guilty to "not being able to produce my registration card." I paid a $33 fine and I was on my way shortly before noon.

I had a really nice lunch with my friend Sara that I met at the Youth Ministry Forum. If you are ever in the Princeton area check out Chambers Walk Cafe. Great food and a nice staff that let me charge my phone battery for the ride home.

I was home by 4:45pm and fell asleep on the couch shortly after (sorry Doug, I sat down to ice my knee and that was all she wrote...)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM AND DAD!

Mom's is today and Dad's was Thursday, so a big Happy Birthday to both of them!!!!

The Ministry of Silly Walks

My new T-Shirt arrived today. That Monty Python clip I posted the other day got me thinking of this sketch which now has entirely new meaning for me. Credit must go to my USNA buddy Mike Siepert who first suggested that the problems with my leg and my occupation made me uniquely qualified for a government grant to develop my silly walk.

I can't wait to wear it to physical therapy. One of the exercises we do actually looks a lot like the picture on the shirt. Except I have to hold my arm straight out parallel to the ground and kick it while I'm walking.
(FB readers click through to my blog for video)

Torture

Everyone loves to bring up the scenario of the "ticking bomb" when discussing torture. Kevin Drum says what I have said for a long time--

OK, here's my view on ticking time bombs. It's not original:

Torture should always be illegal. But if you're really, truly convinced that a nuke is about to go off in downtown Atlanta and the human filth in your possession can tell you where it is, then do your worst. I'll cheer you on, the president will pardon you, and the nation will be grateful. OK?

I wish everyone could just agree on this. It's not as if it's ever going to happen, after all, and if it does, well, the guy who saved Atlanta really would get a presidential pardon, wouldn't he?

Everyone talks about the TV show 24, but while using that type of scenario to justify that torture actually works folks forget the fact that when Jack Bauer uses those techniques HE KNOWS HE IS BREAKING THE LAW and chooses to do it anyway. That's the true test of your convictions -- If you are willing to be punished and face the consequences if you are wrong.

The Bush administration wanted to have legal opinions clearing them of wrong doing before they handed down guidelines on "enhanced interrogation techniques." So bring this to the light of day and justify the crap that was done in our name for the last eight years.

The Republicans think that by throwing some of the muck onto Nancy Pelosi Democrats will back off. It sounds to me like she and the Dems are calling their bluff. All the more reason to hold investigations and put this horrible chapter of our history behind us once and for all.

I am bothered by the knowledge that if this investigation really gets going it will turn into a three ring circus and momentum will be taken away from all of the highly important things this new administration is trying to do to fix all of the problems we face right now. But if we demonstrate to the world that we actually believe the things that we say, and as a society can admit our mistakes and punish those that do wrong regardless of their position then we truly are a great country.

If we don't do the right thing because it is too hard or may cause problems then what kind of message are we sending?

The Ongoing Vehicle Saga

As I mentioned in an earlier post I had the paperwork to clear up the insurance violation on Danielle's car, but they wouldn't take it from me so I needed to get the police to fax the papers directly to the MVA. Sounded easy enough.

I spoke to the officer that handled D's totaled car on Tuesday. He didn't think faxing the papers to the MVA was a good idea (despite the MVA telling me that's what I should have done). He injected a few additional complications that I won't bore you with, but which led to me having to involve Danielle in the process.

On Wednesday she spoke to him and got an earful about ignoring his letters and not properly following through to avoid all of this in the first place. He told her that he was doing this merely to help me. They overcame the complications that he had brought up on Tuesday and he decided that he would write a letter on police letterhead with a live signature for us to hand carry to the MVA. Danielle agreed to get the letter. She called me Wednesday night to say that he had left a message for her that it was ready, but that she had been out and didn't get his message. So she would get it Thursday morning and bring it to me so I could deal with the MVA since she had to work at 12:30.

While expecting a call from Danielle to say that she was on her way with the letter I got a call from the police officer. "Why haven't you picked this letter up that I did for you yesterday?" He was ticked off. Had I known it was there, I could have gotten it myself Wednesday. So I told him that I would be right over to get it. It was sealed in an envelope so I didn't know exactly what was in it, but headed straight to the MVA to take care of this once and for all, or so I thought.

The lady in the MVA takes the letter, opens it and starts working away on her PC to change dates, get over ride codes and tells me I owe $1100! I asked to see the letter that he had written and no where did he put the date of the accident when the car was off the road, only the date the car was scrapped. So I show her the other papers, the ones he wouldn't fax and she says, "Oh, just have him fax those and I'll fix it" AAAAGGGHHHHHH!!

(Side note - I'm sure this is exactly how all those borrowers felt during the loan process on the files that I underwrote, processed or originated back in my mortgage days. I'm so glad I'm no longer in an occupation that inflicts this kind of torture on people. I understand its purpose, but getting things from person A to satisfy person C when you are person B is a royal pain when A and C have their own ideas about what the other should do and why.)

So he and I played phone tag for the rest of the day and by late afternoon he had faxed something, to somewhere, but I'm not exactly sure what he had sent or to which number. He was obviously annoyed that this was dragging on and so was I, so I decided to follow up with the MVA this morning before I bothered him any further.

It took several phone calls, but I am happy to report that the automated system now lists this case as closed and with NO fines. YIPPEE!

I left a grateful message on the officer's voice mail and hope to not have to deal with the MVA or the local police for a long long time.

Although I do have to be in court in New Jersey at 9:15 on Monday morning to face the music up there. I had an idea that I'm hoping will pan out though. I've called and emailed the officer that pulled me over who said that I wouldn't have to return and am hoping that he may be able to pull some strings to avoid the trip. I'm ready to go though and will get to have lunch with Sara (who I met at the Youth Forum) if I do end up going, so there is a silver lining.