There is no easy way to say this.

Danielle moved out on Saturday.

I don’t want to air our dirty laundry, but in the interest of disseminating information and keeping the speculation to a minimum I feel that I need to comment on this at least superficially since it is a major occurrence.

Many of you are aware of the struggles that Danielle and I have dealt with in the eleven years that we have been married. For those of you who don't know the history, a dual diagnosis of mental illness and substance abuse has been a storm cloud that has followed us through our marriage.

Although we still love each other very much, the dynamic that has developed between us as a result of these issues is unhealthy for both of us. I am constantly watching for possible symptoms of relapse and Danielle resents having her feelings discounted as symptoms. Sometimes I am overly vigilant and sometimes she lacks insight into how she is feeling or behaving. Neither extreme is good for us and the struggle has taken its toll on our relationship.

Currently, as has often been the case, we do not agree on what is wrong let alone the best approach to dealing with it. We have reached an impasse and she has decided to deal with things on her own. Initially this is not the way that I wanted to handle things, but I now agree with her that this is the way that it must be.

I do not know if this will be a temporary or a permanent change. Only time will tell.

She has only moved a few blocks away and has offered to be available to assist me with the dogs or to help around the house while I’m still in recovery. It’s nice to know that she is close and willing to help me, but I intend to give her the space that she has requested. I have an amazing support system (that has really been put to the test this year) so I’ll be fine.

Regardless of whether we reconcile or not, I wish her all the best and I will always love her.